Sometimes you’ve got 5 minutes to get out of the house (usually in the mornings) as you cart your lazy ass off to school or work. You can save time by using your sink as a shower and by cleaning only the stinkiest of body parts.
- Pits – Sprinkle some water underneath your armpits and wipe them down firmly with a towel. Then spray or lather on as much smelly deodorant as you’ve got. No one will be able to tell the difference later in the day.
- Pubes – Whether or not you’ve got pubic hair (*cough, cough* ladies), you going to need to wipe down your winky or pinky and the surrounding areas to ward off chaffing and general crotch-stank. Some warm water and a gentle hand should do the trick.
- Bum – Now if there isn’t a body area that’s more prone to stinkyness than your behind. Dab some water on toilet paper and go at it. Make sure to dry however and of course…do this after you have to poo.
- Face – Not good to have a semi-clean body but a greasy face. Wash your face using the standard method. Preferably you’re not going to dry it with the pits or pubs towel. Just a suggestion.
Now you can take a shower in any hotel room, gas station, and Denny’s in the world. To save even more time, brush your teeth only once a day and use hand sanitizer instead of washing your hands.
[photo by: Fractal Artist]
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