There are many times where you need some help lying to your boss, teacher, or wife who almost always need some sort of proof to believe you. The Excused Absence Network gives you the best lie exaggerated truth for your specific situation.

For about $25, students and employees can buy excuse notes that appear to come from doctors or hospitals. Other options include a fake jury summons or an authentic-looking funeral service program complete with comforting poems and a list of pallbearers.

Personally, I think the best excuse is “I can’t be bothered” - though this phrase could cause you to lose your job, fail you classes, and have a piss-filled toilet. I’d advise just saving the $25 and forging your own doctor’s note.